Thought of the Day

A coward’s only reward is to live to fear another day

A Week Passes..

  • Hans reports the findings to the Witchmaster Edgar Archer in charge. Three additional teams are being sent under Hans’s command, as well as a new team member to The Doorstumblers, and also sending Miarga back to The Doorstumblers.
    • Miraga spent the last 3 weeks doing speech therapy with Edgar’s personal adepts. He doesn’t quite succeed, but he makes some progress!
    • N-286 is our newest member! A cyborg tech priest. Very short and skinny, uses all and no pronouns.
  • The Solemn Ark will be moving on for a bit. It’ll be back in the next month to pick us back up. He needs to keep moving to keep up appearances that the ship is a passenger vessel. Until then, Hans is in charge.
  • Lou spends time perfecting her soothsaying.
  • Klightus attempts to work overtime at Bargain Imperial, resulting in him staying awake for 36 hours straight for 3 gelt. He never does this again.
  • Ferrus attempts to steal another car, but gets caught up in a drive by shooting.

Miranda’s Orders

Miranda tells Ferrus to gather Squad The Doorstumblers for their upcoming mission. After an awkward 45 minutes of waiting, a servo skull shows up with a data slate. Hans needs us to get more proof on the weapons smuggling operation to give more information to the authorities. He gives us coords to a potential Bloodshot weapons cache. Its at an apartment complex, number The Doorstumblers0. The authorities do not know we’re doing this. This basically means we can do literally anything we want, so long as we get evidence. They need this done ASAP.

Ferrus attempts to find some new armor, but finds nothing of good quality. Klightus finds a backstreet blacksmith selling a huge two handed axe made out of car parts. Miraga sells some stuff and makes a profit. N-286 spends its time dissecting the cockroach rats at the motel.

The Mission

The Doorstumblers begins making their way to the cache. Miraga turns on the radio and they listen to some Mongolian throat singing dubstep. At first, they think its kinda cringe, but before long they start getting into it. Ferrus gets a little lost in the sauce and crashes into several cars, destroying the van’s muffler. The group turns the music up louder. Ferrus keeps getting the group lost, turning a 6 hour drive into a 10 hour one. The Doorstumblers doesn’t mind, they are vibing so hard. The music is only interrupted by random Thoughts of the Day.

The Doorstumblers arrives to the apartment, Ferrus Tokyo drifts into a parking spot PERFECTLY right as the bass drops. They rush up to the third floor with weapons drawn. Klightus attempts to break down the door and fails. Miraga also attempts to kick down the door, and fails again. Ferrus proves that the third times the charm, and successfully kicks the door in. Somehow, the Bloodshot Gangers were able to hear us coming? They had readied actions to shoot us as soon as the door opens. Ferrus tanks a hit, but the others miss. Miraga shoots a gangster in the head, killing him instantly. A ganger with a shotgun shoots Ferrus in the leg, nearly crippling him. Klightus charges the motherfucker with a shotgun, but misses. He is, however, able to destroy their cover. Lou casts gun to destroy a gangster’s eye, all but killing him. The remaining 2 gangsters immediately surrender.

The Doorstumblers plays an insane game of rock paper scissors to determine who should kill the last gangster, as they all agree they need one alive to interrogate. Klightus wins, and asks the two which of them knows more. They begin freaking out. One screams, the other pisses himself. Klightus counts down from 5 waiting for them to decide, but they’re unable to come to an agreement. Klightus kills the screaming one, wanting the pissy pants guy to stay alive long enough to feel shame. Klightus is able to get out of Pissy Pants that there’s a hidden doorway to the second floor. Ferrus interrogates him more and finds that their boss is a guy called Bob with a machine gun for a hand. He’s downstairs. They kill Pissy Pants as he’s proved all he’s worth. They begin heading downstairs. N-286 is inexplicably stabbing all the corpses post-mortem.

They jump down to the room below, seeing they’ve done some renovations. There’s 18 crates on crates on smuggled weapons and a couple gangsters putting up one last stand. They’re killed almost instantly by Klightus and Miraga. Klightus and N-286 check the crates and find pistols and assault rifles. There’s a steel door with an eye cover. Klightus and Miraga team up to try and break it down, but the steel is too strong for their muscles. Someone on the other side opens the eye cover and throws a frag grenade at the group. Klightus and Miraga are able to tank the hit, but Ferrus just barely avoids death and Michaela burned a fate point. After a few moments, they hear a gangster say “Go away! Git!”. The Doorstumblers ignores this and Lou heals Ferrus. The door suddenly unlocks. Klightus and Lou don’t fall for this and ready actions to hit the first thing that comes out of the door. Miraga opens it and is immediately shot by Bob, the servator with a machine gun arm. He deals some decent damage, but N-286 is able to shut him off using its technology magic shit. Klightus charges at the still-mostly-human guy and lops his arm off. Miraga is able to stabilize him for The Doorstumblers to interrogate.

This Mostly-Human is a very intelligent weaponsmith. His whole M.O. right now is stealing PDF equipment, scrubbing the serial numbers off them, and implants counterfeit serials. He has a workshop back here with 3 more crates ready to starting being worked on. N-286 strips Bob of all his parts for “later use”. Miraga steals a gun that’s been scrubbed of its serial numbers. N-286 and Ferrus attempt to interrogate Mostly-Human. He keeps responding with “Classified Information” and Ferrus shoots him in the head out of sheer frustration. Space Asshole begins playing.

Klightus finds a letter basically saying that the gangsters need to get the tools ready for the “furniture shipments” by “move out day” in a month for “housewarming”. Klightus finds it weird that they’d be writing about moving, everyone else realizes its code to get the guns out of here by some mysterious day. It isn’t specified. It seems like this is only one leg of an unbelievably large scheme. The Inquisition absolutely needs to be involved. N-286 finds a dataslate essentially proving that there’s some corrupt PDF leaders that are selling off these weapons under the table. The Doorstumblers does some looting taking odds and ends from the workshop before they call in to Hans.

Post Mission

As they leave, Ferrus struggles desperately to get out of the parking lot. He’s driving forward, hitting a car, driving backward, hitting another car, ad nauseum. Finally, the engine shits out. Miraga finds a pickup truck. Klightus breaks the window and N-286 hotwires it. Ferrus takes the driver’s seat and N-286 takes shotgun. Klightus, Lou, and Miraga lay down in the bed of the truck and tape themselves down with duct tape. Ferrus peels out immediately going from 0 to 100 and Lou flies out and skids on the pavement. Lou gets inside the truck and duct tapes herself to the center console. Ferrus, after being violently threatened, is finally able to pull the car out of the parking lot. The check engine light is on. The engine is slowly getting warmer. There’s a weird trail of liquid something trailing behind them.

After a few moments, they see bright lights and a highly armored car following them. Lou casts spasm on the driver, giving him a seizure, fucking him up enough to flip their car! A gunman flies out the window. Ferrus is able to just barely pass his drive check. Klightus helps him by reminding him that he needs to use his turn signal. The car crash from spasm causes a huge traffic jam that blocks all backup from getting to The Doorstumblers. They make it back to the motel. N-286 begins repairing the truck as its moments from exploding. Ferrus untapes Lou and Klightus as it starts looking ugly. Luckily, it only blows a gasket rather than catching on fire and exploding. N-286 is able to repair the truck enough to keep it together.

The Doorstumblers unanimously agrees Ferrus shouldn’t be allowed to drive ever again.